Bending Reality

Last week I spent the weekend at a conference.  Typically when I attend conferences it's usually for work and I would go to get the latest updates on policies and procedures and to gather information from various vendors on their newest offerings.  This past weekend was the first I had attended specifically for personal development and it was mind blowing.  

My mind was engaged the entire time and I usually get bored and distracted and start dozing off even in office meetings. But not here.  Each speaker inspired me to think beyond my life and into the world of possibilities of what could be. Each person I met (and I'm usually the quiet type who sticks to herself and plays on her phone in order to avoid talking to people) opened up to me and I felt real connections being made.  

And usually at the end of a conference I go back to my regular life and routine, but not this week.  This week, my mind has been in a whirl and there have been times I had to tell myself to stop thinking because it felt like my mind would explode with information.  It's too much and my mind doesn't have the capacity to hold it all in.  My brain literally felt like if I thought about it anymore it would explode. 

So what have I been thinking about all week?  Here are a couple of the concepts that keep whirling in my mind:

How do I bend my reality?  What do I need to stop accepting as truth and start finding a new way of looking at things.  For example, growing up and into early adulthood I believed that I was suppose to go to college, get a degree, find a job, get married, have kids, keep working until I was able to retire.  I recall even telling someone that "I was going to work my entire life" and I believe I said it so matter of fact, almost as if it was something to be proud of.  Here I am at 36, not married, no kids, and I'm giving myself a year to quit my "job" so I can work on my business full-time.  Definitely not the reality I once dreamed for myself, but a reality that actually excites me instead of one I'm just accepting. 

What do I want my new normal to look like?  Right now, I work four days a week. For many this is already an ideal life and in a way, it is for me too.  Because just a year ago I was working two jobs five days a week and a couple of years further back I was working three jobs seven days a week.  So to work four days a week is pretty amazing.  But here's what I realized.  Why can't I have amazing every day?  And if I could have amazing every day, what would that day look like?  Would I still have to get up at 5am when my alarm goes off to drive to an office over an hour away from where I live?  Is that what I want for myself?  Definitely not.  But what do I want?  Not quite sure yet, but I know I want my new normal to be completely different from what it is today. 

How do I create an awareness of consciousness?  And really, what does that even mean? This is the thought that's been more prevalent in mind.  I even took to the internet to try to find a more concrete definition.  And the conclusion I came to is that every action and decision I make, I need to do it in awareness of self, which really, is incredibly difficult to do.  So much of my life is routine and actions are done out of habit.  I get in the car and drive.  I may think of where I'm going but I don't think of how I'm driving I just drive.  And yet, if I were to do it with conscious awareness I think it would mean paying attention to what's happening and then to appreciate it on some level.  It's confusing and has my mind going round and round.

What are the possibilities of my life that I want to bring into existence? This question is one I can't even answer.  There are some things I know - I want to have a thriving digital business. I want to be happy and healthy and I want the same for my family.  But then what else do I want?  I just don't know.  I think at times that my mind is pretty limited in its ability to think of all the possibilities life has to offer.  Although it has been a bit frustrating when I think of making decisions with intention and not really knowing what my intention is.  But this week, at least today, I've realized that I have to be okay with that because I can't rush the process and when the time is right the answers and the opportunities will come. 

Isn't it amazing how one event can bend our reality?  Have you ever thought about the possibilities of your life?  Have you felt your mind ready to explode in thinking about what life has to offer?  Share with us below and if you want to have a conversation with me about the possibilities of your life, click here to schedule a time to chat with me!